Ken and Neil

Two posts in one day? I just had to throw in the picture of my big brothers together after Neil's 50K. He was first in his age class again this year, and I learned that if you go cheer him on, he shares his loot. I got a beautiful MacForest 50K mug. I feel guilty I didn't earn it the hard way, but that ain't gonna happen in this lifetime.

Great job, Neil! And thanks for letting me hang out with you, Ken. Great picnic, good times. Oh, literally seconds after crossing the finish line, Neil pauses to look at a cricket caught by our cute niece.

Mother's Day

What a great day. I spent the morning at my mom and dad's. My dad pampered us with a deluxe breakfast. I drove home and found that Mike and boys had made MAJOR progress around the yard and house. (We're prepping for siding and patio people to come in and give our house a face-lift.) Even did a load of laundry. Hurray. Then the kids piled me up with homemade cards. Tender thoughts from Berkeley: "Sorry I'm a grumpy teenager. Just ignore everything I say for the next 5 years." Sydney must have made a card a day for the last week and had them all carefully stashed and ready to present today. The kids sang in sacrament meeting, then I went home with sick Sam. I got a long nap and a long walk, and Mike's specialty barbecued chicken dinner. I'm so grateful to be a mom to these fun children. The greatest gift I have been noting lately is the way my girls love each other. They play happily and peacefully (for the most part) and just really adore each other.

I'm trying to remember that feeling gratitude for all the little shining moments can erase anger and anxiety. I focus too much on all the things I want to be doing...all the great programs, plans, and parenting techniques I mean to implement. When there are truly so many great things we already are doing. And the kids are thriving. Focusing on the shining moments clears away the hazy film of stress and despair. Thanks, Angela, for your post on shining moments. She refers to where M. Russell Ballard says:

What can you do, as a young mother, to reduce the pressure and enjoy your family more?

First, recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction.

Author Anna Quindlen reminds us not to rush past the fleeting moments. She said: “The biggest mistake I made [as a parent] is the one that most of us make. . . . I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of [my three children] sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages six, four, and one. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less”(Loud and Clear [2004], 10–11).

I'll end on that note. Happy Mother's Day!

~30 of my favorite times with you, Carl

Watching you laugh when you were a toddler. Being the only one in the family who understood your language. Watching you demolish the newspaper until you were covered in newsprint.

Sheryl and I dressing you up as "Carla." Beads, clip-on earrings, dress, make-up. Why did you never resist us?

Having you call home when you were at Olympics of the Mind, and having your team sing "Happy Birthday" to me.

The summer you were 13. Taking you to high rock (...sorry about the naked people). Getting you to jump first off the unfamiliar cliff (sheesh...sorry about that, too. glad you're not paralyzed).

Same summer. Taking you to the fish ladder and shouting back and forth in the tunnel to be sure you hadn't drowned. Getting mad at mom because she wanted you home by a certain time. (What's wrong with hanging out all night with college kids???)

Playing ping-pong and pool at the Institute.

Churnin' butter.

Pulling into a McDonald's on a road trip, bleary-eyed and hungry. You were a teenager. You walked up to the counter and the McDonald's worker just stared at you. You waited for awhile, then asked "shouldn't you be taking charge of this conversation?"

Mountain biking with you and Mike in Brandis Woods. Cleaning mud off the bikes after.

You grabbing the squeegee from me at the gas station, because I was doing it all wrong. Being genuinely impressed by your window-washing skills.

Taking you to the M.T.C. (almost as good as picking you up 2 years later).

Talking about books. And libraries. And books about libraries. Talking about religion, history, philosophy, alchemy...developing ESP...(insert Twilight Zone music).

Maintaining stoic faces on the roller coasters at Disneyland, while everyone around us screamed.

Seeing my very first nutria, ugly as sin, on the way home from the Cure concert in Paul's vintage Jag. Thank goodness we didn't hit the thing.

Speaking of Paul, the time you two came to Provo fueled by that suspicious homemade root-beer. (Somehow Mike and I ended up stuck with a broken-down Jag.) Having you sleep on our couch for weeks at a time. Lounging all day, really. Then magically awakening to go for a run around midnight each night.

Sharing, more-or-less, the same taste in music.

Meeting Velvet at the Chinese buffet.

Seeing you baptize Velvet.

Seeing you marry Velvet...and watching Berkeley-the-ring-bearer do the potty dance throughout the ceremony. Seeing you dance with Mom at the wedding.

Seeing you and Velvet sealed a few months later.

Buying computers from you and torturing you with expectations of life-long technical support.
Getting life-long technical support.

Asking you questions and having you answer in a humble fashion, embarrassed that you know more than me, about just about everything. Watching you love your little girls.

Playing Settlers with Carl-and-Velvet rules.

Going to Washington D.C. last year. Talking to you on the airplane.

Seeing you plagued like Job. Shingles? Who gets Shingles? The same guy who is struck by appendicitis and pneumonia. Maybe that's not really a favorite, but how about when you Googled shingles, just so you could know the full spectrum of symptoms you could fake? Happy 30th, little bro.